Living creatively, love of photography, and passionate living.

Choices and No Regrets.

I’m a big believer in the idea that whatever choices we make in life — good or bad, right or wrong — we make them alone, and most often, we made the choice that we believed was right for us at the time we made it.  That’s it.  That’s the best it is and all it will ever be. 

We stand alone on this earth.  And, I mean when it comes to how we live our lives and the choices we make.  We might ask others opinions.  We might research possible results.  We might pray to our God for answers.  We might just close our eyes and jump in.  Whatever decision we make, the final choice is ours alone.

Everyone, every single one of us, makes good choices and not so good choices.  And we make choices every day, all day long.  We make the choice in the morning to how we want to start our day.  And, believe it or not, we do have some control about the attitude our day will take on based on how we look at the morning when we get up. 

We decide how we will treat others, and how we will let the way others treat us affect us.  True, sometimes it’s hard to stay focused when others seem to be out to get us (for whatever evil reason of their own), but it can be done.  We just need to remember that no one walks in our shoes but us, and, therefore, no one has the right to judge us for the choices we make.

There are people who seem to make bad choices throughout their lives, as if they never learned from their mistakes.  Mistakes are going to happen in life.  But when a person makes a conscious choice to continue to do things to try to hurt others, to maliciously want to cause another person harm, you have to wonder what is in this person’s heart.  What does such a person think they are going to gain from trying to wound another person? 

These are the people I try to avoid.  There can be nothing good to come out of being around them.  They have not grown up yet, or lack the maturity to deal with life in a rational manner, or don’t, apparently, know how to handle real life and the situations that come from the challenges that arise out of day-to-day living as a supposed grown adult.  Their life is the proverbial train wreck that is waiting to happen.

And it’s unfortunate that we all know someone like this.  They might even be a part of our own family, or someone we have to work with.

Sometimes, a choice can seem unclear.  Seemingly right choices can end up being wrong, or vice versa.  The waters can be murky, leaving us not knowing exactly which way to turn or what decision to make.  I believe it is at this point where we do the best we can, use our hearts and our heads, and move forward with no regrets.  For, truly, we are the only ones that have to answer for our choices, no one else.  And that is exactly why we live our lives for ourself and no one else.  That’s not to say we don’t take other’s feelings into consideration, but only we know the reasons why we make the decisions we do.   

And it’s a shame when others do try to judge us for those decisions which they no nothing about. I think those people usually forget about “those that live in glass houses” and “he who is without sin” casting the first stone. 

If we make our choices with a good heart and good intentions to begin with, that’s the best we can do and should not feel regret, no matter how others may try to judge us.  An evil heart is the thing to question.  Anyone that would purposely try to harm another is the thing to avoid.  Acting out of jealousy or envy or with the purpose to hurt another are all bad choices.

If you’ve made a decision, a choice, that seems unclear of the outcome, try to remember what the goal was.  And always remember that even out of a bad decision, something good can come, if you just look for it.  Sometimes, it just a learning experience.  Sometimes, it’s a way to make you realize that you need to choose a different path.  And, sometimes, you get it right and, eventually, you start to see the forest through the trees.  The path opens up, and things become clear again. 

Stand strong in your decisions always.  If you’ve made them from a good place in your heart, you have nothing to fear, no matter what others might say or how they may try to judge you.  Life is a learning experience as we grow, and we make the best choices we can at the time we have to make them. 

Those that have nothing better to do than to try to tear down others for the choices they make because they can’t focus on their own lives and deal with their own issues is something I will never understand.  I sometimes think it is a way for them to avoid dealing with their own shortcomings in life.  To examine their own life and their own ways is somehow too much for them.

What I do know is that we all travel our own road.  Because of the choices we make, the directions we have chosen to turn, the decisions we make at all the crossroads — it’s all our own path.

20 responses

  1. Very good point to all it. A very good read. Life is nothing but a series dual answer questions, some time. You either did or did not chose a particular path.

    February 21, 2011 at 11:55 am

    • Thanks, Tim. The object is to keep moving forward!

      February 21, 2011 at 11:56 am

    • Whoa, yes.

      That was weirdly accurate and wise. Keep up the good blog commenting, Tim.

      February 22, 2011 at 3:11 pm

      • 😉

        February 22, 2011 at 7:11 pm

  2. Good comments. I agree, except that when there are so many paths we have to take, and we cannot know what the outcomes will be. When it hurts our kids, not through any action of ours, but because we didn’t know . . then it is really hard not to regret having gone down that path. Or married that person. On principle I agree with you, and it has always been my philosophy to do what has to be done and not look back, as best I can.

    February 21, 2011 at 4:13 pm

    • Yes, Janet. We can be sad that maybe we had to make a decision that did hurt someone after all was said and done, and we can even feel sorry about it. Maybe even have some regret. But I hope no one beats themselves up years later over decisions that were made long ago. I like what you said about doing “what has to be done and not look back, as best” you can. Thank you for your comment!

      February 21, 2011 at 6:39 pm

  3. What a thought provoking post. Thanks, Rita. Love the pictures, especially the leaves.

    February 21, 2011 at 9:19 pm

    • Thanks, Jenny! Thinking and taking pics are two of my favorite things to do! 🙂

      February 22, 2011 at 12:41 am

  4. Nice post….and so true, our choices determine our destinations…

    February 22, 2011 at 11:06 pm

    • Thank you for visiting again, and for your comment. 🙂

      February 23, 2011 at 7:03 am

  5. mistakes is the best teacher. Everyone will make mistakes, but with errors that humans can learn to become better.

    February 23, 2011 at 8:28 pm

    • This is very true. Life is a learning lesson. Thanks for reading and for your comment.

      February 24, 2011 at 7:30 am

  6. Very good post, thought provoking. I find that time and hindsight can be great teachers as well as healers. Regardless of how painful past experiences have been, I truly believe that they should be seen as lessons, not baggage. There is a certain truth in ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ Ownership of one’s decisions (especially the ‘bad’ ones) can be incredibly empowering.

    February 24, 2011 at 1:49 pm

    • Well said, Lizzie! Thanks for such a great comment.

      February 24, 2011 at 6:48 pm

  7. Beautifully poignant post. You don’t know how much I needed to read this! Thank you! ~ Nika

    February 27, 2011 at 4:14 pm

    • Hi, Nika. I’m so glad my words could soothe you in some way. Best wishes to you and all your endeavors!

      February 27, 2011 at 4:26 pm

  8. What a nice post. And did you take all those pictures? They’re beautiful, and really helped draw me into the story. I completely agree with you — our lives are our own. And it’s a blessing, not a curse, that we are faced with so many choices each day.

    March 7, 2011 at 1:53 pm

    • Thanks. Yes, I took all the pics. It’s something I like doing.

      Appreciate your comment.

      March 7, 2011 at 4:08 pm

  9. Thanks for the great read – something for all of us to aspire to, and believe in. Cheers.

    April 7, 2011 at 3:36 pm

    • Thank you for visiting and commenting. Please, come back again.

      April 7, 2011 at 4:57 pm

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